Recipes (kinda)

“Recipes” for the busy, vain and culinarily challenged


Yes, I know “culinarily” isn’t a word. But it should be. And as self-appointed King of Becca’s Awesome Blog, I hereby declare “culinarily” to be a real word, to be recognised within the realms of this community, now and forever more, as a sign of the highest culturedness (also a real word) and intelligence!

So, disclaimer: I can’t cook.

Well in fairness, it’s debatable. I can cook FOR ME. But I can legitimately eat an entire jar of pickles by myself, so I’m not sure I’m the best judge of culinary (actually a real word) prowess (very clever word I read in a book). I’ve cooked for friends and family before, and they haven’t thrown up. Actually, some people even asked for seconds (I was possibly 3-4 hours behind on the promised serving time, but I’m sure that’s irrelevant). Either way, cooking is not something which comes naturally to me, so when I do enter the mysterious and alien realm which is my kitchen, I want to grab what I need and get out as soon as possible. Since I started working full-time, I realised I wasn’t getting enough protein or vegetables in my diet, partly because “I’m so busy, I just FORGET TO EAT! Oh gosh I hope people don’t worry I’m getting TOO THIN!”…..mainly because I have a seemingly unending supply of simple carbs and cheese which are just so damn readily available. Much like I am after a bad breakup: you know you’re gonna regret it in the morning, you know it’s bad for you and you’ll feel disgusted with yourself for at least a couple days, but, you know, it’s just….there….

So I needed to get my macros in with minimal effort. “Why not protein shake?”, you say. Well, because they’re gross. And they feel like a cop-out. Like a bunch of expensive chemicals and artificial flavourings designed to make you feel like you’re giving your body what it needs, without actually performing (do not say “much like you after a bad breakup”). I say this with absolutely ZERO knowledge as to whether or not protein shakes and fitness bars etc. actually do what they say they do (cue sponsored product review), but I just feel like I should eat old school “real food”. So, in moments of desperation (and mild malnutrition), I came up with a bunch of pretty palatable recipes which work for me, so they might work for you too. The neat thing is that they are mostly surprisingly flexible (NO! No post-breakup comments, PLEASE!), so you can tailor them to your own tastes and needs…..and wants……and desires…and wishes……..OK so just tastes. Enjoy (maybe)!


search previous next tag category expand menu location phone mail time cart zoom edit close